A Moment of Reflection

I love Fridays for a multitude of reasons, one of them being that we get the East Kootenay Advertiser and I love to peruse it.  I look through the flyers and make lists according to where has the best sale on what, read what kind of local activities are going on in the foreseeable future, and shop for jobs.  No matter if I'm happy or unhappy in a job (the former as of late), it's something I feel I must do.

Imagine my surprise when I looked to see my old Fort Mac company advertising that they are hiring - they were always hiring - BUT right here in the Kootenays!  I certainly would have appreciated that job ad three or four years ago, it would have saved me a trip to Nisku (which I would never take back, so many laughs with my friends Marshall & Heather!)!

Since seeing it in the paper, I've been thinking about Fort McMurray and camp and all the pros and cons of being there.  The good outweighs the bad by a gazillion, as the chance to go work away led me to Cody, to figuring out who I am, and ultimately to a more confident me.  There were downsides too, like being away from home, missing out on important events, and feeling alone.  I think the thing I miss the most is feeling such a sense of accomplishment for meeting the first big goal I ever set my mind to.  I felt so proud of the fact that I got myself up there, attained ALL of my goals (financial, weight loss, happiness), had an important job, and was in control.  My job was created at the start of my employment, my files were set up how I wanted them to be, and people (for the most part) showed some respect for my position in the company.  I took pride in my work because it reflected on me and I cared.

Coming home was a really important thing to do also and was 100% the right decision, but it's taken me a while to realize that this past year has been me trying to recover from my crazy northern adventure.  Instead of taking time when I got home to assess how I was feeling and what I wanted to do next, I jumped into a full time job that is full of stress, frustration, and feeling like I'm coming up short.  Then came moving into our own house, so exciting, but a little removed from right where my family and friends live.  Would I have more company if we lived closer?  I created another dilemma for myself by choosing a place that puts me in a half way spot.  And then the wedding!  So much stress and busyness, followed by so much fun on the day and so much relief afterwards that we pulled it off. 

I guess my point is that this year has been crazy.  My fitness goals have been close to met, then far from met, then close to met again, and now are a little far away for my comfort. 

I feel like everything is hinging on the end of this month.  It's get your sh*t together time for my life.  I have all the ingredients for a well rounded and happy life and I'm not going to let anything get in my way of the positivity I've been chasing for what feels like forever.  My goal is to have a plan of action in place by the end of this week, with the action starting for October 1.  Great things are about to happen and I'll be damned if I'm not ready for them!  BRING ON THE GOAL SETTING!  BRING ON THE POSITIVITY!  I'm going shopping for some poster paper.

XO - Michelle